1. CHILDHOOD DISAPPOINTMENTS: How They Impact a Marriage

    When a couple sits down with me in my consulting room for the first time, the partners usually come prepared to describe the problems in their marriage. Often, they are angry and have lost their patience. They’re ready to point fingers at the other with accusations of “He always . . . ” and “She never. . . ” However, the partners are rarely prepared to discover that old, childhood disapp…Read More

  2. WORKING REMOTELY: Frequently Asked Questions for Individuals

    If you’re new to therapy, or simply new to teletherapy and thinking about engaging in remote individual treatment, here are some FAQ’s that address the efficacy and practicality of working remotely with a mental health clinician. Q: What is teletherapy or video therapy? A: Teletherapy or video therapy is when the patient and the clinician are connected to each other via a video platform such a…Read More

  3. Running Away From Yourself

    This is the new normal. We’re suddenly alone with ourselves. What are you thinking about? What are you feeling? How are you coping? What’s bubbling up to the surface of your awareness? If you’re uncomfortable, you’re not alone. At least, you’re not symbolically alone. You are probably literally alone. And that’s part of the problem. When was the last time you spent 5 weeks and counting…Read More

  4. Phone Session: Does it Work?

    These are confusing times. We’re working from home, separated from people we love and care about. We’re afraid of what we don’t know and don’t understand. We’re anxious for our own health and for the health of our communities, our families and our friends. People are asking about phone sessions. They want to talk to a clinician because they’re anxious, but they’re worried the sessio…Read More

  5. Holiday Distress: Why Isn’t My Life Perfect?

    During the holidays, it’s easier than at other times to become sad or depressed. Holiday time is when our thoughts turn to family and friends. It’s a time when we feel our need to be surrounded by people whom we love and who love us. It’s when we miss people who are no longer with us, when we have the time to call up memories, and when we often feel badly about ourselves and our lives. It’…Read More

  6. The Romance is Gone! 4 Ways to Restore Intimacy

    One of the loudest complaints I hear in my Marriage Counseling practice here at Long Island Counseling is the romance that is gone! No more romantic dinners! No quiet evenings together! No special getaways! No romance in the bedroom! No pillow talk! We’ve lost the spark! Help! Sometimes, it’s obvious that things have changed. Some clear signs that romance and sexual excitement have left the re…Read More

  7. Forgiveness: Healing the Hidden Injury

    Studies show that the practice of forgiveness can reduce depression, stress, anger and hurt. Forgiveness can generate a sense of peace, compassion, hope and self-confidence. It can put you on a path to healthier relationships and to a physically healthier you. Forgiveness influences us to open our hearts to beauty, kindness and love. To practice forgiveness, we are assured that it does not necessa…Read More

  8. Emptiness: What’s Missing?

    We speak frequently about the spaces inside of us. We say “I’m full,” after a big meal. When we encounter someone superficial, we say “He’s an empty suit.” The phrase “full of herself,” denotes grandiosity or an excess of self-regard. As you can see, we make reference to the fullness or emptiness of the inside self. In this blog, I’d like to explore more deeply the question of em…Read More

  9. VOLATILE RELATIONSHIPS: Rage and Obliteration

    I’d like to talk about volatility in relationships. You know what I mean: tempers get hot and things go from zero to sixty at the drop of a hat. Before you know it, you’re both screaming at the top of your lungs, hurling epitaphs at each other, and possibly even crossing the line into physical abuse. It’s when the desire to hurt and injure takes over. (And often it’s when one or both of th…Read More