CHILDHOOD DISAPPOINTMENTS: How They Impact a Marriage

When a couple sits down with me in my consulting room for the first time, the partners usually come prepared to describe the problems in their marriage. Often, they are angry and have lost their patience. They’re ready to point fingers at the other with accusations of “He always . . . ” and “She…

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WORKING REMOTELY: Frequently Asked Questions for Individuals

If you’re new to therapy, or simply new to teletherapy and thinking about engaging in remote individual treatment, here are some FAQ’s that address the efficacy and practicality of working remotely with a mental health clinician. Q: What is teletherapy or video therapy? A: Teletherapy or video therapy is when the patient and the clinician…

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Running Away From Yourself

This is the new normal. We’re suddenly alone with ourselves. What are you thinking about? What are you feeling? How are you coping? What’s bubbling up to the surface of your awareness? If you’re uncomfortable, you’re not alone. At least, you’re not symbolically alone. You are probably literally alone. And that’s part of the problem….

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Phone Session: Does it Work?

These are confusing times. We’re working from home, separated from people we love and care about. We’re afraid of what we don’t know and don’t understand. We’re anxious for our own health and for the health of our communities, our families and our friends. People are asking about phone sessions. They want to talk to…

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Holiday Distress: Why Isn’t My Life Perfect?

During the holidays, it’s easier than at other times to become sad or depressed. Holiday time is when our thoughts turn to family and friends. It’s a time when we feel our need to be surrounded by people whom we love and who love us. It’s when we miss people who are no longer with…

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The Romance is Gone! 4 Ways to Restore Intimacy

One of the loudest complaints I hear in my Marriage Counseling practice here at Long Island Counseling is the romance that is gone! No more romantic dinners! No quiet evenings together! No special getaways! No romance in the bedroom! No pillow talk! We’ve lost the spark! Help! Sometimes, it’s obvious that things have changed. Some…

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Forgiveness: Healing the Hidden Injury

Studies show that the practice of forgiveness can reduce depression, stress, anger and hurt. Forgiveness can generate a sense of peace, compassion, hope and self-confidence. It can put you on a path to healthier relationships and to a physically healthier you. Forgiveness influences us to open our hearts to beauty, kindness and love. To practice…

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Emptiness: What’s Missing?

We speak frequently about the spaces inside of us. We say “I’m full,” after a big meal. When we encounter someone superficial, we say “He’s an empty suit.” The phrase “full of herself,” denotes grandiosity or an excess of self-regard. As you can see, we make reference to the fullness or emptiness of the inside…

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VOLATILE RELATIONSHIPS: Rage and Obliteration

I’d like to talk about volatility in relationships. You know what I mean: tempers get hot and things go from zero to sixty at the drop of a hat. Before you know it, you’re both screaming at the top of your lungs, hurling epitaphs at each other, and possibly even crossing the line into physical…

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SEX: 5 Common Problems

Sex takes place in the brain first!  Even with well-functioning sex organs, the ability to become aroused and sex hormones at appropriate levels, couples can fail to have satisfying sex.  That’s because if the self feels awkward, unsafe or distracted, the mind often can’t wall-off those feelings, and as a result, can’t surrender to any…

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